Posts tagged with Gay rights

Posted 6 months ago

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If gay were a choice, I’d choose gay

It’s well-documented that being gay is not a choice, and considering the one Xmas I received a calculator instead of a Tamagotchi, I’m pretty sure the power of prayer is even less effective at keeping me away from penises. But considering a hypothetical world where sexual orientation and gender identity were a choice, I can conclusively say that I would pick gay again, and again, and again.

“Why would anyone want to be gay if they had the choice?” I’ve heard this argument from queer folks and pitying straights alike who think that being gay (although innate) is a recipe for a difficult life of secrets and discrimination. And I’m not going to say that there aren’t struggles for queer individuals. We live in a largely unfriendly world, and even though there are wonderful people, and things are changing, the reality is that the world is not a wonderland for those on the rainbowy side of life.

But I’d rather ask, if we’re talking about your religious-socially-conservative version of heterosexuality as the alternative: who in their right mind would choose to be straight?

Your straightness is a culture of no. Living your life according to rigid sexual and gender roles to maintain your fragile sense of sexuality, gender, and self. As a man only willing to like sports, cars, beer, and objectifying women because you’re afraid that your love of ballet would somehow destroy your straightness. Or declaring the very end of the world itself because your son painted his toenails pink or likes to play with makeup. Or making your worth directly correlated to your attractiveness or the fertility of your womb. Because your kind of straight tells you no, no you cannot do, like, enjoy, or want whatever is in your heart.

But gayness, queerness, is a culture of yes! Yes I can profess my deep-seated love of musical theatre and shirtless men dancing to electronic music. Yes I can also like sports, or fatty foods, or watching horror movies in my sweatpants.

And sexually? If I enjoy being pounded by a hairy man-beast while trussed up like a Christmas turkey, then god damn it our community will let me go for it. Because if you don’t like it, well then fuck you.

And we stand up for each other’s right to be individuals, to choose our own paths in life free from judgement, interference, or control. It might not be what I want per se, but if it’s how you are, then you damn well better be running down the street in spangly gold booty shorts shrieking Beyonce tunes at the top of your lungs and grabbing your genitals. Whether lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer, or whatever permutation under the umbrella you are, or if you’re our equally important straight allies, we are the ones who say YES. YES, BE YOURSELF!

Because it’s not just the fight for me to be fabulously gay, but the right for me to be fabulously, and unabashedly me no matter what that looks like.

Go ahead, tell me my life is sad and hard, and no one would or should want it. Because me, and all those with me, know who really has it hard, and we’ve got each other’s backs while you are busy stabbing your own.

So ask yourself again if being gay is a choice. Because if it were, then who would ever choose to be straight?

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Posted 11 months ago

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Living in a province affectionately referred to as “Texas North” (oil-rich, conservative), it’s a relative rarity to hear about gay positive actions in our province (with the notable exception of my personal work, because—you know—I’m awesome). Still, the Sunday Calgary Herald greeted me with a giant photo of a gay couple and their child, and its corresponding article on “How Alberta Pioneered Gay Adoption”. As the article states, it’s pretty surprising to hear that Alberta is an unexpectedly open environment for gay adoption, particularly since we’re the one province that once upon a time threatened to use the Notwithstanding Clause to escape recognizing federally legalised gay marriage. But, in this case, our pro-privitization, pro-individual society has opened the doors for private adoption agencies to flourish outside the less-accepting government system. Go capitalism? And why shouldn’t it? I’ve never understood one of the central hypocrisies of the right-wing movement calling itself libertarian (here’s looking at you Tea Party Crazies): that its political philosophy doesn’t jive with its social philosophy. There are many types of conservatism/libertarianism (which are often mixed up together), but what I could never understand is how someone can at one point rail against government involvement in our personal, and economic lives, but wants them to swoop in and regulate everything once buttsex is involved. You don’t get it both ways. You don’t get to tell people they have no right to interfere in your life, and then call for regulation against everything you don’t like. That kind of picking and choosing is reserved for my future totalitarian state. I call it Kristopia: Land of Unimaginable Horrors. Don’t let the name fool you; it will be a utopia. Only for me. Just me. Still, it’s kind of funny to think that the conservative-supported politico-economic environment in Alberta was the exact environment necessary for gay adoption to exist. The free market has chosen, conservatives, and you can’t say “it chose wrong; we’re taking it back” because then you’re just being a douche. There’s also a strange satisfaction in seeing that a huge series of comments on the article have been banned. Although that also means there are a substantial number of idiots out there. I still get the warm fuzzies about this article. Especially considering the success of children of lesbian couples. We should all be so lucky to be raised by lesbians. Zoom Image

Living in a province affectionately referred to as “Texas North” (oil-rich, conservative), it’s a relative rarity to hear about gay positive actions in our province (with the notable exception of my personal work, because—you know—I’m awesome). Still, the Sunday Calgary Herald greeted me with a giant photo of a gay couple and their child, and its corresponding article on “How Alberta Pioneered Gay Adoption”.

As the article states, it’s pretty surprising to hear that Alberta is an unexpectedly open environment for gay adoption, particularly since we’re the one province that once upon a time threatened to use the Notwithstanding Clause to escape recognizing federally legalised gay marriage.

But, in this case, our pro-privitization, pro-individual society has opened the doors for private adoption agencies to flourish outside the less-accepting government system. Go capitalism?

And why shouldn’t it? I’ve never understood one of the central hypocrisies of the right-wing movement calling itself libertarian (here’s looking at you Tea Party Crazies): that its political philosophy doesn’t jive with its social philosophy. There are many types of conservatism/libertarianism (which are often mixed up together), but what I could never understand is how someone can at one point rail against government involvement in our personal, and economic lives, but wants them to swoop in and regulate everything once buttsex is involved. You don’t get it both ways. You don’t get to tell people they have no right to interfere in your life, and then call for regulation against everything you don’t like. That kind of picking and choosing is reserved for my future totalitarian state. I call it Kristopia: Land of Unimaginable Horrors. Don’t let the name fool you; it will be a utopia. Only for me. Just me.

Still, it’s kind of funny to think that the conservative-supported politico-economic environment in Alberta was the exact environment necessary for gay adoption to exist. The free market has chosen, conservatives, and you can’t say “it chose wrong; we’re taking it back” because then you’re just being a douche.

There’s also a strange satisfaction in seeing that a huge series of comments on the article have been banned. Although that also means there are a substantial number of idiots out there.

I still get the warm fuzzies about this article. Especially considering the success of children of lesbian couples. We should all be so lucky to be raised by lesbians.

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